Smackdown TV report for 02/10/2012

Reported by Ernest I Aguilar

The Smack is being laid Down for us tonight in Tulsa Oklahoma. The show begins with Royal Rumble winner, Sheamus, making his way to the ring.

Sheamus tells us that as a child he was bullied because of his pasty skin and spiky hair. He tells us that he fought back against his bullies, and got so good at fighting that now he's in the main event at WrestleMania. Sheamus is interrupted by Wade Barrett. 

Wade is here to tell Sheamus that he'd better not choose to wrestle for the World Heavyweight title at WrestleMania because he intends to become the World Champion after the Elimination Chamber match. Sheamus claims to have missed Wade's entire speech because he was too busy thinking of the beating Randy Orton gave Barrett last week. 

Cody Rhodes comes out next. Cody tells us that unlike Barrett and Sheamus, Cody actually knows what it's like to win a match at WrestleMania. Cody Rhodes also says that unlike all of us, he doesn't cry when he sees himself naked in the mirror. (For the record, I don't cry when I see myself naked in the mirror. But I'll bet Dusty Rhodes does.) 

Cody is interrupted by the Big Show. Show tells Cody to shut his mouth or else he'll slap the taste out of it. Cody reminds the Big Show of his lousy winning record at WrestleMania and asks who he's going to lose to this year; another boxer or Sumo wrestler? 

Cody says that Giants may be able to win at the Superbowl, but not at WrestleMania. Snookie has a better record at WrestleMania than the Big Show. Big Show knocks Cody out of the ring and Sheamus knocks Barrett out of the ring. 

Commercial

Match #1: Jinder Mahal versus Kali. 

Squash. Kali lands some big chops; Jinder lands some meaningless kicks and a punch or two. Kali hits Jinder with a Big Chop and then finishes him off with a double handed choke slam for the win. 

After the match, Teddy Long and Aksana continue their months long flirtation until they are interrupted by Daniel Bryan. Bryan is furious that Teddy had a parking lot BBQ before the show tonight. Teddy thinks it's because he forgot to invite Daniel, but Daniel tells him he was offended as a Vegan. 

Bryan tells us that he's so sickened at the thought of all those slaughtered animals and all that poison Teddy put into his body that he doesn't think he can compete tonight. Teddy tells Bryan that his veganism is no excuse for missing his match tonight with Randy Orton, so he'd better go get ready. Bryan leaves angrily. 

Commercial

Match #2: Beth Phoenix versus Alicia Fox. 

Another squash. Beth beats on Alicia. Alicia fights back. Beth puts her away with the Glam Slam. Alicia did manage one nice move: a matrix-like ducking of a Phoenix clothesline attempt. After the match Beth continues the attack on Alicia until Tamina comes to the rescue. 

Beth and Tamina smile at each other way too long; when two people stare and smile that long, sex or violence is inevitable. It's probably going to be violence; violence is so much more PG than sex. 

Commercial

When we return, we see a video tribute to the Rock. It's a lovely tribute immediately followed by another farting segment featuring Natalya. This time Natalya knocks Hornswoggle head over heels (literally) with the power of her foul smelling flatulence, and then blames it on Tyson Kidd. I guess Natalya doesn't have a dog. 

Commercial

Match #3: Wade Barrett and Cody Rhodes versus the Big Show and Sheamus. 

Cody and the Big Show start things off. Cody's first move is to tag in Wade and the retreat to the floor. Big Show pulls Wade into the ring and hits him with a big chop in the corner. Wade tags in Cody and Cody lands several kicks. Big Show throws Cody across the ring into the corner and then knocks him down with a pair of big chops. 

Show military presses Cody and then lets him fall to the mat behind him. Big Show cocks his fist and Cody retreats to the floor. Big Show tags in Sheamus and Cody tags in Wade Barrett. The two men lock up and Sheamus lands some punches and a clothesline. Wade retaliates with a big boot, but Sheamus responds by knocking Barrett into the ropes. 

Sheamus wraps Wade up in the ropes and repeatedly pounds his chest. Wade lands a kick to Sheamus and tags in Cody. Cody lands a couple kicks and throws Sheamus out to the floor. 

Commercial

When we return, Cody is working on the arm of Sheamus. Sheamus fights his way out and bodyslams Cody. Cody tries to take Sheamus over with a backslide, but Sheamus powers out of it and flattens Cody with a rolling fireman's carry slam. Sheamus tags in Big Show. The Big Show lands a couple punches and then applies an abdominal claw. Cody lands a kick and tags in Barrett. 

Barrett clotheslines Big Show as Cody sweeps his legs out from under him. Barrett mounts and pounds on the Big Show. Wade tags in Cody and Cody hits Big Show with a missile dropkick. Cody gets up on Big Show's back and applies a chin lock. Big Show throws Cody off and Cody tags in Barrett. Barrett takes the Big Show down with a chop block. Wade lands a big boot to the face of Big Show and covers him for a 2 count. 

Wade gets behind the Big Show and applies a chin lock. Big Show escapes by backing Wade into the corner. Wade tags in Cody and Cody hits the Big Show with a springboard kick (Beautiful Disaster). Cody puts Big Show in another chin lock and the Big Show drops backwards, crushing Cody. 

Big Show tags in Sheamus and Cody tags in Wade. Sheamus hits Wade with a pair of clotheslines and a powerslam. Cody tries to interfere but gets speared by the Big Show. Sheamus hits Wade with a Brogue kick for the win! 

Commercial

When we return, Michael Cole introduces AJ for an in ring interview. AJ says she is starting to feel better and thanks the fans for their support. Cole laughs and says what support; most of the fans don't even know who she is. Cole claims to be joking and continues, asking AJ if she blames the Big Show for what happened to her, and also why she was at ringside in the first place. 

AJ says she was there because Daniel asked her to be there, and she loves him. She also says that she never blamed the Big Show. AJ then goes on to say that she DOES blame Michael Cole for being a biased obnoxious jerk! Michael Cole, being the obnoxious jerk that he is, disagrees. Cole claims to be paid for his insight and personality. Cole also claims to have heard rumors that Daniel Bryan set AJ up to be run over by the Big Show. 

Cole finally claims that Daniel Bryan will lose his title at WrestleMania and that Daniel and AJ will become nothing more than a footnote in WWE history. Daniel Bryan comes out to defend AJ and remind us all that he is a great role model. He also tells us that while we were all stuffing ourselves with beer and dead animals this Sunday while watching the Superbowl; he went for a nature walk. I wish I had gone for a nature walk, I hate the Giants. Of course my nature would include a lot of chili, nachos, and beer. 

Daniel also tells us that he cares about the environment; that's why he's driving AJ home in his Prius. (Or, as it's known in South Park, a Pious.) Daniel feels that AJ has been too traumatized by Cole's interview, so he needs to take her home now. 

In the back, Teddy Long stops Daniel Bryan as he's walking with AJ. Teddy tells Daniel that if AJ needs to go home he's happy to provide transportation for her; but if Daniel Bryan leaves this building before his match tonight, he will lose his title. 

Commercial

Match #4: Ted DiBiase versus Hunico with Camacho.

Ted gets behind Hunico and slams him into the corner. Ted lands a punch and then clotheslines Hunico to the floor. Ted goes after Hunico, slams him into the security barrier and then rolls him back into the ring. Hunico takes Ted down and then throws him out of the ring. Hunico distracts the ref so Camacho can get in a cheap shot. Hunico goes after Ted, lands a kick, and then slams him into the steel post. 

Hunico rolls Ted into the ring and starts to attack DiBiase's previously injured wrist. Ted fights his way out and the two men exchange punches. Ted clotheslines Hunico and goes for a cover, but gets only 2. Hunico goes after DiBiase's wrist again and slams it down onto his knees. Hunico tries another armlock on DiBiase, but DiBiase reverses it and rolls Hunico up for the win! 

Commercial

When we return, we get the exciting news that John Laryngitis has been retained by the Board of Directors as the interim general manager of Monday night Raw. John calls himself Mr. Excitement and then delivers an especially unexciting speech. 

Commercial

Match #5: Daniel Bryan versus Randy Orton. 

The Big Show joins the announcers to do commentary. Big Show claims Daniel Bryan is lucky to still be champion, but Josh asks if he's lucky or just smart. Big Show admits that Daniel Bryan does have a devious intelligence. The match starts with Orton and Bryan locking up and Orton pushing Bryan to the corner. After a clean break, Orton puts Bryan in a headlock. 

Orton whips Bryan to the ropes and knocks him down twice with a shoulder block. Bryan gets a takedown on Orton and gets on top, but Orton escapes and gets to his feet. Orton takes Bryan down with a drop toe hold and then puts an armlock on him. Daniel Bryan fights his way out, landing several kicks and a pair of European uppercuts. Orton whips Bryan into the ropes and charges after. 

Bryan runs up the ropes and flies up and over Orton. Orton hits Bryan with a dropkick and gets a 2 count. The two men get to their feet and exchange a series of punches, kicks, and European uppercuts. Orton eventually gets the upper hand and backdrops Bryan to the floor.

Orton rolls Bryan back into the ring and then stops and stares at the Big Show before re entering the ring himself. As Orton re enters the ring, Bryan knocks him back to the floor. Bryan comes off the edge of the ring to hit Randy in the head with a running high knee. 

Commercial

When we return, Daniel Bryan is in control and working on Orton's arm. Bryan twists Orton's arm around and then snaps it down over his shoulders. Bryan tries to do the same thing a second time, but this time Orton counters with an inverted headlock backbreaker. 

Bryan retaliates with kicks and Orton lands a punch. Orton drops Bryan with a gut wrench elevated neckbreaker and gets a 2 count. Orton puts Bryan on the top turnbuckle and attempts a superplex, but Bryan pushes him off. Bryan leaps off the top rope, but Orton rolls out of the way. 

Orton hits Bryan with a pair of clotheslines and a scoop powerslam. Orton tries to hit Bryan with a rope hung DDT, but Bryan escapes. Bryan hits Orton with a big kick to the head and climbs to the top rope. Orton climbs up after Bryan and hits him with a superplex and gets another 2 count. 

Orton stomps Bryan repeatedly but then misses with a knee strike. Daniel hits Orton with several stiff kicks and tries for a cover. Orton rolls Bryan up for a pin fall attempt of his own, but Bryan reverses it and nearly locks in the Lebell lock. Orton blocks the Lebell lock and backdrops Bryan into the ropes. 

Orton hits Bryan with a rope hung DDT and gets ready to go for an RKO. Bryan blocks the RKO by snapping Orton's head down on the top rope and dropping to the floor. Bryan walks over to the ring keeper's table and grabs his title. Bryan then walks over to the Big Show and punches him. 

The Big Show slams Bryan into the security barrier and then throws him back into the ring. Orton hits Bryan with an RKO, but it's for nothing. Bryan successfully goaded the Big Show into attacking him, thus forcing the referee to declare Daniel Bryan the winner by disqualification. 

After the match, Randy Orton confronts the Big Show, obviously angry about the DQ. Orton pushes the Big Show, and then the Big Show pushes Orton down to the floor. Orton gets up and attacks the Big Show, jumping on him and pounding him repeatedly. 

The Big Show pushes Orton off and throws him over the table. Orton charges after the Big Show again and the continue brawling. Daniel Bryan smiles while watching Big Show and Orton beating each other senseless as SmackDown goes off the air.